By Sarah Biernat
Hey,
What other people think of me is NONE of MY business.
Years ago, I was sitting in a counseling session going through a pretty rough time. It shook me at my core and triggered many emotions within me. My counselor looked at me and said “Sarah, what other people think of you is none of your business.” Uh huh, yeah. “Sarah, what other people think of you is NONE of your business.” I must have had the glossy look in my eyes because he then handed me a print out of that quote filling an entire page. It took a few days for me to let that one sink in.
Ya’ll, I had spent my life being a people pleaser. I’m not sure up until that point I can remember doing ANYTHING that I didn’t think about “what will others think of this” before I acted. This is not a very authentic, full of joy way of life. It is pretty much like living in a prison within your own body. Honestly, I am thankful I have gone through a couple of hard periods of rejection and ridicule that made me look at that statement and attempt to start living a different way. I am not free and clear yet, there are a few times people can still get my goat, but I can say, I don’t live my day to day life worrying about what others think. (Cross my fingers behind my back- don’t test me world now that I said that.)
Recently, I got to see this first hand. A local brewery has been doing an open mic night for adults. He decided to do one for kids and BOOM the place was packed and there was a huge line up of kids who wanted to perform. We went on a last-minute invite. We told Anna on the way to the brewery what we were about to do. Anna is a sweet tender-hearted girl. She doesn’t thrive in crowds or seek attention from others. She is happy in her imaginative world with her close pack of pals. When we got there her eyes lit up and she wanted to perform. She was coming out of her skin so excited. So-unrehearsed with another friend, they marched up there and sang in front of a brewery full of people they didn’t know of all ages. I was floored and beaming inside with pride. When she was finished she said “Mom, I was kind of scared what the teenagers would think”. She’s right on the edge. She realizes others have opinions of her but it hasn’t taken over her natural desire to do things she loves. She isn’t paralyzed by others opinions.
This night challenged me like that statement did years ago. What would authentic Sarah be doing if she didn’t concern herself with what other people thought of her? That fact of the matter is almost 100% of what I assume people think of me isn’t even a thought in their heads and if it is, poo on them, they need a hobby.
So, I challenge you, what would you be doing differently if others opinions did not dictate your decisions? Would you sign up for an art class or join an exercise group? Say no to an event you “should” go to and instead to spend time with your family at home? Would you skip the alcohol at a social event when it seems everyone has a drink in hand? Eat a salad in front of your critical family or co-workers when they decide to nit-pick what you are eating? Would you sign up for a race even though you know you may finish last? Would you parent differently and take off some expectations we place on kids?
One last time friends. WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK OF YOU IS NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS. Let THEM hold onto that! Don’t let that be your truth. Live your authentic one of a kind lives. Let it be an adventure that you love.
Blessings! Sarah
Sarah has her Bachelors degree in Health and Wellness Management, is a Registered Nurse and a Certified Personal Trainer. She works at Tall Trainer Fitness systems http://www.talltrainer.com/ , enjoys subbing as the school nurse and is involved in Rahab's Rebels fundraising to support a local home for women rescued from sex trafficking https://www.thepottershandsfoundation.org/. Sarah lives in Bloomfield with her husband and best friend Jeremy (The Tall Trainer) and her daughters Anna and Hope. She enjoys anything outside in nature with her family, reading, and attempting to be crafty:) . She is just trying to share hope in this beautiful mess of life and find adventure in the day to day.
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